it has been a while since i wrote anything in here, i think, well yeah, anyways i felt like writing or something.

emotions are overwhelming me right now and i just want to vent them up, but i don't feel like whining about stuff anymore,
i don't know if i became more mature or more stupid, i find it very hard to decide, but then again i guess that choice isn't for me to make either.
I just want to feel better, cuz i have no right to feel like this cuz i'm not the only person in this world who has problems, some people have worst problems than me, and  i just want to accept what i have and be grateful for it without so much trouble, but my mind or heart whatever it's just won't let me, and it's unnerving me cuz i know i'm being just stupid and that other people don't have the time to deal with me so i just have to get over it, but i just seem to be unable to, i try and i feel alright for a couple of days or hours maybe seconds for all that matters but this feeling just keeps coming back and i ignored the best i can, but sometimes is easier just to let it consume me and drown in it, cuz when i'm alone is just feels right, like if i could stay like that forever, and i would if i could but time goes on, and those little moments i have for myself disappear and i'm just left with the emptiness once more, and i don't want that.


But whatever writing this isn't making it any better right now, i just feel dull, but life goes on and i guess that just will make everything better again, i just wish life didn't happen and least not this way, for whatever, i have stuff to do, not right now but farther ahead, and right now i will just wait for those moments to come, and make the best out of what i have right now!

Yeah i felt like updating this, first I'm on winter break and so far so good!XD

The day we got out i went to play pool with some of my friends and i remember it that i really suck! 0.o oh well but it was still fun and then we went to drink, i had never really drank in my life so i acted a little stupid^^; well maybe more than a little but i had lots of fun and was laughing just about eveything i usually do that but this time is was just plain stupid*sigh*, yeah and then when i got to my house my grandma was like let me smell u and i was like why and she was like to see if u drank, but she didn't find anything!:D

then i went to the Posada Otaku, it was fun and i got to meet new people, the bad thing is that me and my bro arrived late, like really late so we could only stay for a little while, but in the end they were selling this Yaoi manga and i was like i want it, but by the time i got to the part they were selling it, someone had already bought it, i was so drepress that the memory will haunt for life but oh well it was still fun!

Yeah i got my grades too, they are pretty good but i got and 87 on chemistry or kinf of a -B, and i know i'm going to get ranted about it, but oh well, then i went to my little cousins bautizo thingy and it was kind of fun, but it think i behaved badly on church, i mean one of my cousins was telling jokes to my little brother and cousin and well he was like calling my name cuz he wanted me to listen to him, i think his attention deprived it, cuz whenever i see him, he's always calling me, like i sneezed come watch me or a dog is pissing come see it with me...well maybe not but he wants me to be by his side like 24/7 and yeah the thing is he was telling jokes and i gave in and listened to them, i know it was childlis of me but oh well then we were taking pictures and i still can't beleive i had to wear a dress, i mean is bad enough i have to wear a skirt to school but a dress i'm scarred for life!:(

yeah then he decided to come with us to our house and he decided to sleep with me, i mean i have no problem with that but he like got all over bed and then on top of that he woke me up before noon,hahahahaha....but actually he did, and then he was like pushing me to sleep again cuz i wasn't laughing at his jokes cuz i was sleepy, but then he left and now i'm wating for my mom come, i haven't seen her in a long time, since like september so she's like coming for Christmas so I'm happy for that and yeah while waiting like i could use the computer i started to play games with my little bro, it was really fun!^_^

But now my head hurts, cuz from singing to dancing to pillow fighting anf candy eating it turn into a headbutt match, and while it was really fun, i have a headache now cuz then my older brother decided to join we were no match for him*sniff*

But yeah, on another topic I'm worried cuz i haven't been napping lately, i always have to take a nap at least once in the day and i haven't and in the night i haven't really be sleeping and then i wake up kind of early, now that worries me, i know i didn't want to sleep so much anymore but is to soon to leave my beloved naps and i finally found where i can buy a plushie!<3

That would be like my perfect present, i wouldn't want anything else but i don't have money right now and i don't think...no I'm sure no one is going to give it to me, but oh well i still have to buy my Christmas presents, but tomorrow is already the 23th!^^; Hahahaha, oh well last minute shopping is the best or was it the other way around, oh well to late for that now!^_^

Yeah and then my computer decided to die on me again, but luckily is back but it doesn't let me use Mozilla Firefox or however is supposed to be typed, but at least i can used it again, yeah i have lots of things to do, but i'm being lazy right now and i'm gettin tired of typing and i have to go pee, but i don't want to get up!0.o......maybe u didn't need to know that so yeah, that's it!:D

And i don't miss school, but i miss hanging out with the Freaky's hahahaha, but seriously i do, but if I said i'm bored i would be lying cuz i'm having a good time but still!<3